The Gnome Depot, a dragon... and a whole lot of fire | Dead Ice | Campaign 1: Episode 2

ah we are live all right this is very important i need to know oh i don't see anyone now who wants to die you broke it who wants to live yeah it's all black screen on no no no i see it on twitter okay now there's stuff that's weird black screen that's good oh my god

because i'm working from home and i don't usually do them these days it's weird how do i turn off people's names on here turn off people eric you're talking to the right guy

we'll figure it out that's next time close like youtube tabs that are all monster hunter rise themed oh god amazing yeah and getting my ass kicked by by monsters now they were getting my eyes out

as is right like we don't we don't even cut off agreed anything nothing gets cut up because i should probably be like welcome to the dead end dnd show featuring a bunch of [ __ ] nerds uh last time uh grave cleric geralt embarks on his quest with the ranger ellick along with mercenary adventure group gnome depot made up of lore bard finnick and lucky songs shutters tempest neblen and soul knife rogue tie the mana well getting their bearings on the road north of mirabar they'd be set by a clan of knowledge the marauders are no match for the band and after a brief confrontation they continue on their path to the lair of a red dragon meet the stone tooth and inspire the world mountains we join our heroes as they put forward finishing touches on their ambassador to the dragon flared something about dnd should probably do a slower recap no future no no absolutely not okay maybe more innunciative next time on dnd

dude no because now unlike when we played without putting up a recording when we should have done a recap because people couldn't possibly know what's happening before now they can go back and watch the last episode or listen to the last episode hey vexis thank you for the bits hey thank you for level five that well some of the characters you're playing are level three some of us are playing level three we're doing a side adventure right now yeah so me so scatters tai and finnegan are level three and derelict is five five yeah and and alec who is our elf friend is what is he ten ten dang what is it dm npc okay so let's go i have a very important question yeah yeah very important it's an a or b question um legend the film yes yes i love tangerine dream yes or

i forgot the name like don't even say the other one it's tangerine tangerine dream don't be [ __ ] rude i don't know what this is you're talking about the score yeah my very important part of legend is when she dances with the dress like that to this day every time that scene happens i'm like this is awesome imagine how good that movie could have been had the studio not burned down but it's also so good already it is i love it i got to add it to my rotation i don't remember the movie that was legend what's so awesome i don't think i remember it like though i know there's a lot of star trek fans sitting here in this room what and you're all like rob ricardo what a great doctor no no no yeah what a great troll fair enough that's fair make muckle bones yep big michael bones um you think me yeah vexius the three level threes that are in this group we just made it for this side adventure um normally we have level five characters yeah but none of them wanted to come on this adventure yeah basically um my character derelict uh had a bit of a history with um some vampire business which i'm not going to go into but anyway a vampire crossed paths with us while we were uh taking our time in mirabar and uh trying to relax and uh anyway uh yeah i got attacked and um our npc friend or i don't think friend is overstating it alec the ranger uh offered to help me with my uh issues with this vampire and i agreed to help him with uh well what we're doing now which is to i believe put a dragon in a bottle which i actually wanted to discuss with alec before i forget exactly how did that work so we don't screw this up for him he has no clue he doesn't know how magic works he's a he bought it he bought something from a wizard so he could trap a dragon so anyway he alec helped me with my vampire problem so i'm helping alec with his dragon problem however the rest of the party uh we had actually spoken with this dragon at some point and they're under the false impression that they are friends uh i don't really trust necessarily uh but what alec did for me that was uh that was a big favor so uh my personal code uh requires me to help him and uh yeah i know i i don't trust the dragon as far as i can throw him frankly he's gonna he's gonna test that uh by throwing me so but daryl left jokes on me at some point the last time the dragon saw you you're really old so you might not recognize you right he might recognize your smell maybe i think it's true it's fine it's fine i this is gonna be this is gonna be interesting the dragon

so yeah so that's why we're here but yeah because the rest of the party wasn't so keen on uh on doing this uh it's just me and alec and uh he he went to the pub and uh and hired this uh motley crew of uh the gnome depot uh and so we have uh three gnome friends who are joining us uh uh for the first time and that that i think catches us up oh

i cannot click on the right side of my stream screen the screen while doing this it the the new app will like overwrite everything so i have to alt tab oh dear um so adventures in using a little bit of new software this time too yeah yeah all right vexis and this is hilarious my favorite character i'm playing now is my tabaxi drunken master monk that's addicted to catnip i named her mittens i love it it's pretty good that's amazing that's really good yeah oh i can't wait to use my my um my my really bad irish accent and my really bad irish insults today oh yeah that's what i forgot i love that i'm a deep gnome and yet i have a southern accent because in my mind i was like deep sound like i played it doesn't work like who's australian because they're from the lane down under

well right like the doctor says back when the doctor was cool um you know a lot of places have a south so that's true it's true they do i think he said a lot of places have a north oh yeah that's right he was

i need to know you said you wanted to fight the dragon in this cave yep which is mostly it's actually quite glittery and not full of although there is phosphorescent fungus so this area is entirely lit by dim light it's lit bam yeah um so i need uh presumably stealth checks okay all right uh probably a survival check to lure this dragon into an ambush

which one do you want to do or is or can we focus this on our you could have more tv i was supposed to rogue scout oh yeah you were sorry i rolled i was excited to roll i mean i don't know what you want to scout here's your here's your battleground you've already everything else is cleared out already you guys the other team had already been here so uh i believe i get advantage on stealth checks to hide rocky terrain that counts is this as do you sorry just before we really get going um if we're just about to try to lure him in i want to cast the shield of faith on on everybody um just to just just to do that okay there is an opportunity did you double check what kind of spell shield the faith is

uh no it's a concentration but these are scrolls um

themselves and concentrate on it but you can only cast one shield of faith oh okay sorry i didn't understand that all right well i don't know who else can cash yield to fade but i'll give them scrolls um would i be able to do that if it's on your spell list uh as a cleric or paladin okay i guess the i guess i've got spirits when one of us is dying you know yeah all right okay never mind that is my my bad don't worry those are the cheap scrolls yeah yeah yeah it's cool it's cool all right uh well at least i can i can throw them at 60 feet so i've got i can i can throw off random shields of faith when i need to we can hit on the headphones okay one why all right never mind never mind okay so back to work wait didn't you buy other scrolls that you were gonna use that was the only one i could actually apply to the party uh i've got stuff that shoots and oops oh wait didn't you get potions uh yeah gave each of us a potion because we haven't been able to buy them yeah yeah so everyone gets a common uh 2d4 plus 2 uh potion of healing so yeah that yes yes sorry yeah that's thank you for reminding me yeah so everyone everyone gets a potion of healing

and i'm going to cast protection from energy on myself then

so i'll have just the one concentration spell for myself thank you for the potion you're welcome

yeah who keeps whacking their mic no that might do nothing it's not me that might be my clicking is close to the mic so i'll bring my

accessible two ranger spells on himself

i don't think he can cast them on other people oh that's a touch spell

then again did we determine if you're going to use message or if i'm going to use my thing um i guess it just depends on when we're gonna when we need to talk to each other right because if you talk to me i can talk to you back because normally it's just one is it one way normally no messages both ways you can messages as much as you can say within six seconds and then they can reply with as much as they can say within six seconds okay cool

okay uh what are your stealth checks and where are you gonna hide 20. well i do want to be up in that area just like an oversee so i think where you put me is actually not a bad spot but i don't know if we want to be on a different ledge let's all just sort of decide that first um i will kind of go down and hug the rocks that are at the bottom of the ledge

oh that's me i'm finn again you want to go like down here yeah but like right against the rocks she wants to be on the south

like so at the base of the of the drop like just keep in mind if it comes to attack us on the upper tier you gotta run back all the way up so just so you you're hoping that it's going to land out there for you to beat on it oh i mean i'm hoping that it does not uh shoot a cone of fire at us

well luckily there are places to hide behind up here oh then never mind i would like to go back up on the ledge okay she goes for a light jog comes back rocks guys i think these are the best rocks these are all separate like dwarven severes that you can hide behind this does seem to be a bit of desecration i just want everyone to know that we may need to do something about that later but as tempest says a battle cry means no rules

yeah i think i heard that one what you're talking about

god i feel left out i need to make a gnome with an accent now we're here to help you we are your gnome support your gnome away from gnome you know

dave hates it already i don't know where oh the dice is right here okay i don't know how to move mine up the handyman is that okay so i'm gonna zoom in oh and scroll over so we've got who is this this is what's his face

hide in the furthest corner way up here the top layer no the top left keep going go further back here

you realize the further you get no no no no no no i'll go to that far right um uh coffin thing yeah right sure i'm good over here so rude that's where i was gonna go oh dad you can you can we can hang out

don't you just whisper at it with our power

yeah i'll go hang out with finn again okay two gnomes and a trench coat we don't have a trench coat though not yet

does anybody have minor illusion can we have a trench coat i do have my knowledge it's just a trench coat floating in the wind

instead of the one no it's when one of your hands is young it's a minor illusion what wow that is an impressive you know what initiative i rolled uh i don't know wait are we supposed to roll initiative i'm just when people think you can play the piano it's a minor illusion okay hashtag keys thanks for stopping by vxts bye

uh can i shut off my camera or is that gonna throw off all the placement it will throw off all the placement okay shield the safe we just we'd love seeing you in just how are we gonna know when you're in pain with all the gnome puns oh no you'll know you know i'm always in pain

that's my secret cat i'm always in pain but gnome related pain existence is pain uh seeing as there are three gnomes if there is constant pain um shoot i wish i had a bottle opener i only have one stealth check so far yeah it's a 20. uh i rolled um a 14 i believe um let me just check yeah 14. i hope uh i hope that laughter is a positive it says i have proficiency in stealth does that mean i roll twice or just once just once it just means you get to add your proficiency bonus which you are which you do when it when you roll okay i got it you got a nine okay

yeah like i have an advantage but i already got 20.

what do you still see

is shatters hiding or no oh hi guys i can speak draconic me too no i can't really i can comprehend languages iconic

shatters

i tried so hard ain't got so far but in the end it doesn't even shift

you know we should we should put a bunch of traps along this cave you know sort of make it a a no malone situation

it's been again but it's also my colleague hawking

i'll be the third layer tour well okay

okay well again i forgot to open up my tonic so just straight gin what ginger you have um spirit of york just like that yeah always a good choice i have a lovely blueberry gin over there it's

uh steve inspired me so i made iced coffee in my house i have been um not eating past 7 p.m and so i'm only having water i'm being good are you yeah are you fasting seven to seven are you just not eating after seven o'clock i'm just trying not to eat it after seven after dinner because i know night time is usually like hey maybe i can eat maybe one or two bags of chips is it the family size yes yes

yesterday man i walked to mama's pizza and i saw they had a walk-in special for an extra large yeah and i ate the whole thing that's awesome i ate a whole freaking extra large yesterday it was so unnecessary yesterday tasty that sounds so good megan sat right beside me with a big bowl of chips i was like you

and she was like i'm [ __ ] growing a person i might eat all right yeah exactly i was like fine it's fine she's like you get that chip off your shoulder huh

i'm here to support megan you need to you need to like weaponize the puns like gotta make it into an actual feature yeah right it should be a feat yeah well it's just something that we get like a bonus you know for every pun i probably have to be a bard and really make it work you know every time we hit it it seems like an untapped resource is all i'm saying every time we hit the dragon it's like a gnome run because we're not gonna be because we're in a league of worlds oh my god where's this dragon i know i've been waiting i'll think of their gnome i've been waiting for you guys

plans in place are you ready to go yeah we've discussed this in secret i have that discussion up but i don't really remember

quick read i know it's right i mean you can only play it so much then when the battle happens you gotta adapt so i know what i'm doing i'm gonna be vaguely playing yeah

here we go well we had our positions and then in some way we were going to try to lure the dragon in which could easily be somebody pouring it in physically i mean like alex ella can take care of that part then ella can do that and there you go which is why he's standing right here and a dragon well i cannot see oh i was gonna say i could also have a miner

i mean like you have to understand like this is not you specifically didn't want to fight it in its lair right so now you can put it here someone had to bring the dragon here and that person nobody said that they were going to do that or how they were going to do that so naturally it's going to be the much faster much tougher npc well yeah i sort of figured either we would accidentally lure it at the wrong time or i like would do it properly for us before the fight begins i want to turn to my allies and say there's no race left known

and that's it those are my probably my dying words we'll see i would just really thinking of letting some of you live i'm gonna like really you can kill me i'm using this character in another campaign like no they like their characters they should get you know we should like have them back one day but every second that goes by i just want to incinerate

all right i'm gonna i'm gonna turn to ty oh god and say

namaste you know if we were ever pirates we wouldn't be able to have somebody named ann you know why why because no man is an island

go ahead go ahead start rolling initiative oh i'm ready and then i will describe the scene for you

14. oh it hurts

for shatters

oh my god if she was a samurai she could be sasha ronan

somebody please just kidding don't wash any more rolls but like if you do you could be like a 47 of ronin type thing i could

um a very incensed dragon oh comes clawing down this long hallway jeez this is a you remember this door this is like a big metal door yeah yeah right it's like a little door in it yeah yeah he rips the whole thing off and the dragon just pushes it over the whole thing tears it down

like embers uh being exhaled out of its nostrils

uh and it roars the way a dragon roars and it echoes through the cavern um it's like every three seconds i hear doom yeah um i don't know what that is i don't know maybe it could be me quick guys use the door it's a jar i put the dragon in the drawer um and the dragon in a very low angry growl says i smell you demon demon why have you returned

uh and it comes well it's my first time here so it's not closer well i i i don't think it's me oh my god i gotta help that while the dragon approaches i'm just gonna quick sniff check my pits

you know i'm a haunted one i have some demons for sure i'm going to turn to ty and say it's a little known fact but i've never been here

okay and alec calls out to it and he says you reneged on our deal you were supposed to leave it alive

i would like to use a cancer to talk to alex you alec

what can trip would you like to use a message

i'm gonna message uh alec and say what the hell are you talking about this wasn't part of it well there's enough time to have this conversation here six seconds that looks like i lick my balls

uh and then the dragon starts charging forward and then uh we go into initiative

alec didn't even respond tai dang see you can't be trusted what you hear is him enchanting a spell uh which is hunter's mark sounds good good for him you know miles away zanden's like yeah we were right

xana looks to the off in the distance all right keeps widdling marcus is eating chowder he's step five we're all just eating and then he marks it which is great um dave can you move the map up just a little bit i just want to see where that patch goes the the one right by me this one here yeah that lead that's the exit yeah yeah i know it's like i'm gonna live it's not going to make a difference but sure well the david dragon can't fit through it i just wanted to see if it was two or four like how big uh the creatures can squeeze all right that's fine if it wants to we can get through there and then he readies an action alec alexa dragon alec he he wrote the highest initiative the dragon's a she so oh fair that's right true uh i is next if tai is going to do anything already in action tai is going to do something

so i have a psychic ability it's um

it's where i'm able to communicate with other people's psychic right yep yeah i'm aware of it i'm trying to look for it oh there you go psychic whispers yes um so

i was gonna see if i could telepathically link to the other two gnomes because it's for two creatures that you can see and that way we can all speak telepathically to each other so we can like coordinate attacks without the teacher that the other creature like hearing us you know yeah yeah so like doing a message but it lasts longer so you roll one psychic energy die which is a d six

five okay so for five hours nice uh you can send or receive messages with no action as long as you're within one mile of each other

um you and the creatures don't need to speak kindly for a number of hours you go to the number of role the chosen creature can speak telepathically with you so they can each communicate with you they can't communicate with each other though yeah but that way i can relay things if i need to yes but we can coordinate a little more amongst our know me selves because now it's like what is going on uh go ahead and mark that off yeah i did okay and then i think i'm pretty sure that's like my main app like action okay great and i don't know if i can really do anything bonus wise at least i don't want to do anything at the moment [ __ ] um yeah i'm just going to continue to stay hidden for the moment okay daryleth bell you are up next uh what's the timing of a divide ready in action to coincide with whatever alec does next like do we act at the same time or do i act before him if you say you were like hey i want to like uh i want to ready and act like whatever your action is i want already in action for before or aft like it you have to you can't wait i'll take you before but you have to wait for a triggering event and then you get to use your reaction to perform your action right so uh what would you want your trigger you could be like hey if the dragon gets within x distance right that could be a trigger okay uh well i was going to go off of alex so if alec attacks or moves i don't know can i pick those two conditions i'm not sure about that yes yes yeah absolutely yeah then i want to uh delay a guiding bolts scroll attack on this perfect perfect yeah okay it's going to be legit how legit too legit finn again

what is finnegan doing the dragon is on its way on approach but

we went into initiative order you said that was me that's you um i am going to cast the minor illusion okay and it will be the sound of alec okay coming from uh the see that top middle uh a pathway like up here yeah the sound of him

like an echo of an ellick um anything hey over here yeah dumbass dragon i'm sure that's not his voice but i can't remember what his accent was it's another accent you can't do sounds like scottish is what it is he's scottish just think of outlander

freedom um okay go ahead and roll a deception check for me 25 also that's as far as you can cast that spell okay because it has a range of 30 feet yeah yeah

uh so you're just 30 no no

25 25 that's really good will the dragon be fooled by 25

okay i guess you'll find out when the dragon acts scatters what would you like to do as the dragon draws ever nearer

uh there is really not a whole lot that i can do yes it really yeah you don't want to like rage too early no so

i am just i'm gonna i'm i'm yanking out my war hammer i'm holding it in two hands and i am running in action if uh the dragon seems to get anywhere close to me i'ma smash it with the war hammer that's fine okay

and i scream bone of the tempest bone yeah yeah it's gonna be great we got this come on guys the dragon as uh this like auditory only ellick appears the dragon like tilts its head and then it hears this other shout and then like gets like just genuinely confused um aren't

so let's see i don't know if you're aware dragons move yeah it's awesome i should have moved down to the bottom five six nine ten 11 12 13.

i wonder if i could sneak further down the map and like we make a circle and just keep confusing i was thinking about doing the same thing it might be hard though the dragon is gonna swipe one it's gonna swing low and swipe one claw in this area i was about to say that to lyric but i held it in i was like be good nope i won't be okay uh the dragon swipes a claw and then it continues until it gets to here um and ellick has a uh a pouch on his hip and he pulls out you realize now from a bag of holding an eight-foot long spear

and jabs it at the dragon nice one and he is a level 11 so he has two attacks okay dora milaje we see you

yeah first attack that two is going to miss there's the second his new name is ellick and jobu that's he doesn't need to culture culturally appropriate any fictional uh he's already got his own color i'm trying to hype him up do it i'm pretty sure he could rip the heads off of the jordan meleen to be honest he's very powerful uh because he just rolled 26 which is a d12 plus six plus a d6 because of hunter's mark

six plus six is twelve

so he misses the first strike the second strike um he jabs the spear i have to complete this now because there's nothing there um jabs the spear right into the chest of the dragon um as it like rears back um i believe you had a readied action derelict fell yeah i was going to fire on it when uh alec attacks so i'm just going to roll the strap yeah roll a spell a range spell attack yeah so the spell because it's uh sh the spell scroll uh gives me a plus five on that hit on that roll

come on roll what's going on oh okay i think i screwed it up sorry each square is five feet yeah yeah there we go the dragon's not even done its movement yet wow these are these are reactions well i actually got enough of 20 on that so that's awesome because you double all those dice then nice all right that definitely hits that's a guiding bolt it does 46. yeah so you roll eight e6 okay so i just rolled just eight out all at once then yeah okay all right that's awesome all right what did i get 28.

that's actually that's a big hit that is a big hit lucky plus uh whoever gets their next action he's got a slight glimmer on the dragon now yeah there is now a um a vats-like glow about the dragon making it easy to see and kind of giving you like a pinpoint on where you should target probably somewhere on the chest

that's awesome um the dragon now gets to finish its movement and is gonna get within the last five feet and get a claw attack and a bite attack against ellick

uh that's probably gonna hit because that's a 21 and the bite

is a 19 plus yeah yeah those that's two hits those are two big hits okay uh what do we do

i'm gonna need some d tens there we go a byte is 2d 10 plus six it's 18 damage

and a claw is 2d6 plus 6. it's 12. okay so after stabbing in in the chest uh the dragon

uh you did good eric you actually you did eat one attack with that uh that little bit of trickery um and excuse me um the dragon comes down and bites at ellick catching him like just just like a bit on the shoulder you gotta think this is a big dragon but it's still probably only about maybe the size of a crocodile with wings okay so it's not like it can't like alex tally's like six six or something like that um so it can't like swallow him whole uh but it you know it can get a good you know nip on him um and then it drags its claws across his leg um you know drawing blood it's a good hit uh it's not fatal at all for him but it is a good hit um and then the dragon stops his movement there and that's all of its actions which does bring us back to ellick um who can now just attack three times gonna make sure i made like

yeah yeah does he still is did anyone attack between for the advantage uh glimmer nobody's gone yet okay and everybody already used their their actions of their reactions that they could i thought lauren ready it didn't get close enough to me to shatters right for shatters uh reaction to work but that's not the end of the world i'm just staying hidden yeah but we can communicate so shut up whenever you guys just felt the presence in your mind when i did that i mean if this is a crit is going to be huge damage

that is 25 to hit which does hit the dragon so he still does the d12 plus a d6

and so 16 more damage i mean these are good hit that actually this dragon might not last as long as i thought it would um roll crit get hit hey oh now it's a three that's gonna miss okay are you guys able to look in the uh the discord me yeah you guys oh yeah i can on my phone are we making a separate gnome discord for our secret talks in our heads

um and then he's gonna mark it with his slayer's prey which i already forgot to do which would have added another d6 uh but that's fine uh and he's just gonna stand put and try and keep its attention uh and now it's everyone else so he did eat up the advantage to hit but he did deal a solid blow to it um so now it's everyone else so starting with tai okay so it is mostly within rain if you you could go beneath it and you'd be within range of it um it is 10 feet from the ledge so if you have a reach weapon you could definitely hit it right now i was going to use my psychic blades to attack you're going to throw them yes [ __ ] a love it a ranged attack awesome i love it um so i'm going to roll do that let's see if only it weren't some ridiculous gnome that's a 14 to hit 14 does not hit a big fuck-off dragon

but you have the off hand if you want to do the bonus action yeah i'll do the bonus action one i'm hoping i can get my sneak attack uh i gotta double check on your snake attack i mean that's fine

because they might i think the enemy has to be within five feet of actually it is within five feet of election what am i saying yeah okay yeah you will get stick attack what am i saying yeah of course okay well then i'll do my off-handed uh psychic blades all right go for it rolling sixteen

it's so close it's okay i'm just warming up it's very close it just grazes by its head the first one you know clear mist but these uh you know these things pale blue knives fling out of your hands uh and glide by the dragon um

and if the dragon knew what was good for it'd be it'd be worried right now but you know it's a dragon uh do you want to stay there do you want a bonus oh you already use the bonus section do you want to move anywhere right now yeah i think i'm going to move um i'm going to see if i can get past the dragon whilst staying hidden relatively like literally

you can go you can literally be out of sight if you want but it doesn't mean you're hidden right because you can't take the height actually because i have to take hide yeah yeah but you can be out of so like there's places you can go right now plus you're small you can literally stand behind this thing and basically have full cover well i have cover where i'm at so if i move over to another place nearby they just won't know i'm there potentially i mean you know dragons have excellent hearing so it's quite possible it'll hear your footsteps right but what i'm saying where do you want in case it's breath weapon goes off which is a very real possibility where do you think a good place to be right now might be

not beside finnegan yeah not beside finnegan obviously you want to go stand together in a nice stir-fry kind of configuration thank you so much for asking if you can i only have 25 feet let me find if you can just get

you want to go back here yeah right there okay that's as far as i can get with 25. that works um and i'm just going tell the buddies in the psychic link that what my plan is to basically go down the stairs or if i have to drop however and get around the dragon so i can do more is it flying though at that like that's the thing the dragon is currently flying yes yeah it is not touching the ground but i have a lot of ranged attacks anyway and if i want to be sneaky and not let it like i can keep moving around okay that way you guys can fight for my pioneers this clip is only 10 feet you could stand beneath the dragon and attack it okay the dragon is only 10 feet in the air okay how tall are the ceilings here the ceiling out in the main cavern out here is 50 feet this ceiling is 25 feet okay all right that's tighter so i believe that's it for my turn so you actually which should be fair so this you have 50 feet here you 25 feet technically minus 10 feet so this is only a 15 foot it's pretty tight so the dragon can't really beat it because it's the dragon's 10 by 10 by 10 right so we can't really be in here and not be within range yeah okay uh next is derelith fell uh i'm gonna use another scroll then um so i will attempt to hit it again if it if it works you know what just happened no it's pretty something i clicked on if i'm sorry please forgive me uh so that's a 23 to hit so hopefully that's a hit yeah that's another big this is these are good hits these are 4d6 i mean 86 that's good no no this one is this one's a four uh because that wasn't a double damage so right yeah still good yeah yeah very well it's good very good yeah not even using up your spell slots yet very good yeah oh that's why okay so 18 oh that's a big hit and it's uh advantage on the next hit yeah uh that's awesome so you mutter first a few words from the scroll and a bolt of holy energy flies out and strikes the dragon and as this happens the scroll turns to ash uh did you want to move anywhere um

actually no i think that we're we're spaced well yeah i want to be far enough away from alex so we don't both get caught so i'm going to no i'm going to stay in the same spot oh also yeah i should have asked this earlier but just i just wanted to know how damage does alec look right now the dragon looks more beat up than him right now okay all right uh because normally if i do like a bonus spell action i have to do it first right that's correct okay and you won't be able to do it with what you're doing right now anyway oh i can't do it with scrolls okay that's well no the scroll it's because the scroll is not a cantrip if you do a bonus action spell all you can cast after is a standard standard sorry 3.5 an action can trip okay all right so you could eldritch you can heal and then eldritch blast just fine right okay right okay that's good to know yeah alec looks pretty good like he's taken two hits yeah uh he's he's at like three quarters hit points though okay all right the dragon make sure he's still up yup sorry go ahead

actually that's interesting the dragon now has as many hit points as elix started with okay that's good so if you could kill alec then you could kill the track okay well that's easily not really the goal but it's faster than him um dave what's up it's me uh you move shatters instead of thai

that's why that's actually what i was looking at but i think that that's supposed to be shatters that is ties uh you gnomes you all look alike so we've been mixed up the whole time that's the true minor illusion that's what i was looking at that's what i was trying to figure out i didn't want i was like done

i can't even see these things

even though we're tiny people you can make us big so we can see the pictures just not bigger than five feet i probably did that wrong again let's find out no i know who's here now i could have made my character named thai knee but

you know what i could do just right click and go to alt text and find out who's who that's chatters nice well

all right sorry actually you were there

okay wait kind of missing the thing is you still i was up near finnegan at the top so i'm supposed to be there behind daryl lafell yeah and chad and chatters is actually supposed to be where she started yeah back down no no no no shadrach was lower yeah shatters is down by alex she was she was yeah next to ella yeah there we go we got it you know you guys can log in and and move your minis around right i tried and i can't see the map i don't know i can only do too much it's over it's um the map is off the actual control alt and then delay like minus minus minus minus minus minus minus like this oh fine i'll start zooming in and moving messages and if you zoom in too much like i just did you know yeah that's what it looks like so go to 50 and scroll right yeah okay that's valid okay actually we can probably zoom in now because uh this battle's a little tighter oh there's spin again there he is all right so what i realized is this program this program uh is always front so i have to minimize it if i want to click other things on my screen

okay d d beyond okay so it is finnegan's turn finnegan's turn to use vicious mockery finn again is that a saving throw no it is a cantrip

does the dragon have to make a savings i think it's a wisdom it's a wisdom saving wisdom savings what's the dc it is

somewhere spell save dc should be on your spell page

yeah oh geez i actually hit my head on the mic i'm professional under hit dc it's wisdom 14 yeah okay i rolled a 12 plus 4 is 16. okay your terrible words fall on deaf ears what do you say though finnegan oh you're as sharp as a beach ball

damage ball that's like pretty good that's pretty good if you would have said that before i might have given a disadvantage maybe you'll deflate their ego

yeah do you have a bonus action or a move i'm going to move up so

there's a a little coffiny thing at the yeah the left yeah right there

like like here yeah yeah there okay that's it yeah okay let's hit shatters

is it tall enough that if i ran over to the edge i could hit it

yeah i'd like to run over to the edge and hit it

you can because you're because you're so tiny this square is adjacent to that square so you're just teetering on the edge but you're tired you're small so you can stand i must i'm small and

i screw i i uh like i as i'm running over there i just scream

legs of tempest and going to a rage do you say legs of tempest what does it even mean i'm pretty sure it's because she says she's doing them all wrong right so it would be arms right at the arms of tempest normally if you yell tempest one of these times excellent six layers i'm gonna rage and i am going to attempt to hit it with two hands raised above me with my

not warhammer i'm impressed you can reach it that's uh 13. i do not think that's going to hit unfortunately that is not high enough to hit the dragon we're such a tiny group of people such a low level it is it is difficult for you guys to hit it's true it is uh question um you helped build this warhammer with the raging um does it include the plus two melee oh sorry no no that's yeah okay uh it's not plus two to hit plus two damage it's plus two damage i just realized that as i was saying it barbarians aren't better at hitting things they're better at damaging things listen until they get reckless and then they're better at hitting things i'm trying my best well at least i'm trying to attack things so myself i can lose my my range anyways thanks for getting in melee with the dragon i really appreciate it despite all her rage she's still just a gnome in a cave

oh i should have brought my guitar over oh the nice thing is oh wait a minute wait a minute you attacked it you have advantage oh that's right it's glowing yeah

i uh swing down i try to hit it in the head i miss but then i smack it in the chin as i lift it back up it's like one of those accidental hits where you like go in and you're like oh shucks and the dragon's like turning to hit alec and you just like yeah i'm wise guy

i it's just seven damage but i do that's seven more damage than that dragon had before your turn and i say ice cream armament art art arkan fall

i'm just screaming random words that are amazing i'm really excited for what's about to happen oh no i'm very all right listen i knew what i was going you need to say one two three four five six you know what's amazing you know what's amazing but i'm right there you great job everybody's in the comments because it's a 30-foot cone [ __ ] so one two three people need to make now derelict is behind cover

i know i'm behind derelict so has cap cover add two to your saving throw for this dexterity savings bro okay okay but shatters and ellick both are just gonna roll and whatever they get they get luckily alec is resistant to fire i believe that i have dexterity against effects that i can see while i'm not blinded deafened during capacity is it magic or is it something else it just says effects uh okay let me double check here what am i saving throws

hear me out if i fail this check i can use my scion you don't have to roll at all or outside of the cone it's a thirty foot cone one two three four five six zeros oh wait i don't have to do you don't know you're outside of the effect you're marshmallows

not because you're known but because you're a barbarian you have an advantage on dexterity saving throws that you can see yes you have advantage on this saving throw yeah excellent yes that used to be called actually i think it's still called danger sense um uh it could be just that i don't know uh i got a 15. okay ellick didn't roll great on the die but ellick adds a lot to his dexter because he's a yeah he's not he's called danger sense he's a 15 you have a 15. i believe you all rolled 15s because daryl the fell rolled the 13 plus 2 is 15. and

oh you're right you have the shield yeah yeah oh oh wait i don't know protection from energy fire so i don't know what's the question you have the shield master fee right uh yes well are you gonna use your uh reaction yes i have a reaction i will use the reaction great okay because as a reaction you you're 17 saves and you have evasion when you use your shield nice yes so you take so derelict takes no damage ty is outside of range it takes no damage finnegan rolled a total of 15. not finnegan i'm not i'm sorry shattered 15 unfortunately is a failure damn it but that means alec also failed well there you go um so this is gonna be a lot of [ __ ] damage that's a lot of sixes oh no that's a lot of sick

i'm really glad shatters got one attacking i am i am oh my god we can bring you back maybe um maybe probably not oh okay so it's uh i'm not pulling any punches this is 16 d6 damage

that's right now here's the thing ellick takes all that while he's taking half of this because he's resistant so alec takes 31 points of fire damage which really [ __ ] him up and shatters take 63 points of fire damage um and there is nothing left that's like five times her health yeah i was gonna say no it's not it's not it's like two times data is actually a barbarian enrolls d12 so how much health does shatters have shatters has 32 health which means that double my death would be 64. and i got 63. holy [ __ ] oh my god

wow wow you do not take massive damage wow but you are at zero hit points i am very much unconscious but you know what i am not dead that is the most incredible thing i've ever seen a barbarian do oh my god why not die barbarian didn't really do it i mean it was yeah yes because those are my twelve hit that's because those are deteriorating that's why it up yeah i'd be dead like five times i think the rest of you would be death yeah we'll all be dead yeah we'd all be dead terrible but that was the first time i got to use my feet so that was actually great that was nice

i can't believe i rolled 16 d6 and you didn't die that's i mean i'm honestly amazed i'm genuinely amazed in fact the dragon is very confused that i have not just like crumbled into dust uh in fact the dragon is now fly away in fear uh well i mean the dragon wouldn't call it fear i think you would call it a tactical retreat uh but ellick will get a free attack attacking opportunity as it leaves we just said that

so okay let me tell you why this is great and i know i'm a dm playing a character right now but uh as a monster hunter with so monster hunter is the thing you get to add a d6 to one hit plus hunter's mark because every time you hit you had a d6 plus it's a d21 weapon so it's two it's 4d6 plus 2d 12. i'm not trying to be like the cool guy

i mean i was hoping like derelict done a lot of damage but this could really [ __ ] up this dragon

i mean ellick also just took 63 or halves but 31 points of fire damage all right okay we got a six we got a three and a one that's ten a two and an eight that's twenty plus six is 26 damage not as much as i would have thought

yeah there we go all the more reason for it to fly away um 70 feet one two three four five six seven 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 is there

wow that is genuinely crazy and alec now has to go

well he doesn't care about the gnome so he's not gonna help the gnome naturally

that's [ __ ] rude you're just a hired gun yeah but he doesn't need to leave me to die yeah there's a grave player to take care of he's leaving you to be stabilized don't get it twisted if he was leaving you to die just whatever the ground cleric does you'll be fine um how fast oh yeah he did cat so he's got 40 movement right now five six seven eight nine ten wait no eight

drop it down that's a 22 acrobatics that's one move

he doesn't have anything that can oh you know what he can probably throw his dagger one two three four five six seven that's 35 feet that's disadvantage but it's 25 an attack is an attack all right three attacks two 18s that's a hit an eight and a one that's a miss

uh wow two hits okay

four [ __ ] this dragon is going back to its lair isn't it 13 damage does sound like something that they would do

no insult it bring it back

oh no seriously this time say the insult before we roll oh i was going to 23. hey that's not bad for throwing for throwing a dagger that splits into three daggers 23 damage nice nice it's all the d6s that you add as a ranger it's really good like you can just fight with the dagger if you want okay eric and then is finnegan a rock gnome uh no i thought he would be because he's a bird damn it i get it okay uh ty yes uh your gnome companion is down the dragon is removably fleeing um as far as you can tell okay so i'm going to use my movement i'm moving myself okay thank you thank you 25 oh it worked okay so i'm next to my my buddy my pal shatters over here now i'm gonna use my potion of healing on her okay 2d four plus two duty four plus two gotta roll i got a three and a one which is four plus two is six six hit points no need for death saves that is genuinely incredible i'm up thank you i'm telling you you can throw really hard monsters at your players it doesn't matter they [ __ ] live

i my eyes my eyes flicker open and i feebly say

tempest falls but men ride on

i'm gonna say hell yeah you're like a looney tunes character where the entire in front of you is just charred right now right

yeah that is your action unfortunately to feed somebody potion is your action yeah that's fine uh you got a bonus yeah i was going to do cunning action uh to see if i could dash because i'm going to try and make my way yeah just just another 25 feet um can i just jump down if you succeed on an acrobatics check which you probably will because you're broke i'll roll for it all right it's not difficult i mean it's 10 feet anybody you know anybody who knows parkour can drop 10 feet like no problem that's a 25. hey no problem you do a sweet [ __ ] roll you like jump down it's steep but you kind of slide and then you land you do a nice somersault and you pop kick back up i yell who

let me see my dash is just the same movement right yep it's 25 again technically what you're doing as a dash is you're not moving you know like moving and then moving you're just moving the whole time but faster

25 you stretch i know i made myself a war okay i think i'm normal nope

i'm one of them wide gnomes i'm a deep gnome oh i think i fixed it oh lord she coming oh um when i do hide in this terrain i have advantage because i'm happy yes but you do still need something to hide behind oh yeah i know that but okay i wouldn't let you know i understand when i get there but yeah right now i'm not hitting i just cute okay oh that's the end of my turn can't do it all right derelict fell there's a good turn all right so uh

sorry the gnome is now at what like six points six hit points yeah

all right i'm just wondering whether i could fire off another shot i didn't know damn it 70 plus it's more than 70 feet away from you but probably less than 100 right that's what matters okay uh i'm going to move up to the injured gnome as my move action and then i'm going to fire off another you know i'm just going to use another spell scroll just in case awesome so

so there's the dragons flying about 10 feet above the ground uh and there's this faint blue phosphorescence making the dragon probably seem almost purple all right so it's a position 18 i don't know if that one hit 18 just hits okay all right lucky that you haven't met wow that's really honestly that's really impressive that you haven't missed on a single one of these spell scrolls yeah cause if you missed those scrolls still gone yeah i know

it's okay you know it's great 14 damage is good damage in front not in front of your normal adventuring party but in front of these gnomes daryl the fell looks awesome there that belt looks awesome that's when daryl spells among his peers it's when everyone's like you can't land i'll take it gonna adopt us and just keep literally throwing jones in the trench coat we're just gonna take the gnome fan club around with me they're gonna be one whole other part

temp is sleeping as a reaction to that alex gonna say like you remember i need it alive like if you kill it i'll kill all of you that's why i asked you about how the the jar worked okay well whatever it's glowing now he can do whatever he's the closest though he is the closest uh it's not his turn though it shatters shatters inexplicably after taking a dragon blast not just full force but directly to the face survived

so temp so shatter's tempest neblem is going to get to his feet

shake it off just a bunch of so it comes off

for a new fresh layer of skin underneath it's honestly it's beautiful it's baby fresh it's like you're like that kid uh from charlie brown who's always dirty i can't think of his name okay there we go pig pig pen after pig pen grew up like soot incredible and i imagine these stories you can tell other barbarians oh i'm i'm already pumped i thought i died for tempest and i'm back to life are you kidding me like tempest is gonna love me this is i i don't really get what tempest wants with me but i know he's gonna be happy it's a good day to die exactly um i'm gonna pick up my warhammer and i am gonna start running for the stairs okay uh 25 feet you say i don't have heat i say if you want a double move you can make it to the arrow the top of the arrow the top of the arrow i will double move because [ __ ] yeah yeah thank you and i

scream at the top of my lungs

you gotta do better than that yeah stupid dragon

did i skip eric i skipped eric what do i feel like i did i i'm normally after um oh no no no no you did that you did a spell that didn't work that's right no no no i did a vicious mockery yeah i did a game it didn't work it didn't work i love you not even using your level 1 spells you're still using yet i was actually going to use one to heal bambi and not vaping three shattered it's the dragon dragon's gotta roll to see if it's fire breath recharges

i'm not gonna tell you what happens that's fair but the dragon's gonna keep moving oh i i worry about this um

getting uh funneled in here that just like fire yeah no breath weapons are pretty pretty good brittany muted

the dragon's running away that's what i said i was like she's saying something maybe it's a pun okay we are at alec who there's no business like no 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 is 50 80 yeah nice that's a double move geez that's far yeah no he's got the fastest movement of all this yeah he can't at the start of the before the fight he's cast long strider on himself which gives him ten more movements yes yeah he also casts protection from poison just in case

uh but he can't triple move like a rogue unfortunately um and he doesn't have any other bonus actions does he nope not really do you know what he can do uh he goes invisible just yeah that's that's pretty good you just can't see him anymore you see him running and he just disappears um ty what are you doing

i'm gonna i guess do my movement and then dash like i'm worried that what if the dragon's just backing up and it's gonna like i got out of and i'm not hiding um but first i'll use my movement because why not i think he did miss me in the last round no you go next yeah

last turn you cast vicious mockery on it it's saved no that was the turn before no you've cast it twice that's my movement we're only on we're just now on the fourth round i'm gonna dash one two and you've cast it twice in the first turn i don't know i remember what you did the first turn the illusion oh that's right the illusion i did illusion and vicious mockery once i didn't do it just in case i'm gonna go right there so i use my movement and dash and i'm just gonna be there just in case i don't trust this fully i'm just gonna convey to my friends what i'm doing so the dragon didn't save against your second vicious mockery no i didn't do a second one only i've only done it once what's going on here okay yeah actually we have this error once

i'm undoing what i did but i can't undo what other people did uh i just moved my character to that corner left is not where he was standing hold on okay also that's not where alec was what the hell yeah i don't know what's gonna

that's probably too far now somewhere down there okay i'm back where i was supposed to be so i'm hiding slightly into that alcove a little bit uh but not hiding and not taking the hot action but i moved and dashed so that's where i am at the moment yeah finnegan goes before shatters yeah no the dragon didn't roll the second um in salt safe i i yeah i didn't do a second one i only did dragon was that insulted i was like i won't even roll i won't even acknowledge that i know i'm after development i don't know what that is and i won't respond to it yes r.i.p jessica

oh my god firefox just let me

type in the thing i'm trying to type in

there's no way to tell okay eric what do you want to do that's okay i was just gonna move down and try and catch up with the group because i'm so far away well you want to move twice as far yes uh 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 is a hundred feet which is actually two you have 25 yeah i have 25 million dollars you could get to there if you just sprinted the whole way yeah i don't i can't do anything that's cool um

actually i'm gonna

i'm gonna do one of my bonus actions at the end of it uh let me see you can see

nope you can inspire chatters i was gonna i'm gonna i'm gonna inspire um the the coolest uh person here gary let's fell just so he's so damn cool he's inspiration oh he's he just keeps uh doing so many cool things he made the dragon purple

you light up my life i was wondering when you were going to start using bardic inspiration yeah i was going to use it on alec but then he [ __ ] off yeah he's like what's my range he doesn't need him yeah but it's always nice to have uh yeah

so as a bonus action a creature within 60 feet can hear you that can hear you gains an inspiration die 1d6 for 10 minutes the creature can add it to one ability check attack roll or saving through nice that's for you i'm gonna click mine i never thought the gnomish limericks would give my heart a swell maybe it's that like you're so annoyed you gotta no derelict you know gnome is where the heart is we're running our way into the same pun twice i'm i'm not it's not allowed the inspiration brings me back to the third layer of bay outdoor thank you i i don't think there i i've seen gnome rules about that exactly that was just when we were talking about the name so it's not really a pun

if somebody was a gnome inquisitor they could be uh sherlock gnomes though that's already like a children's movie isn't it is it no no no no no no no no no no no there was i think a sherlock gnome movie as well uh it's probably a sequel to those though yeah it actually might have been the second 2018 sherlock gnomes eminent detective sherlock gnomes and his assistant investigate the sudden disappearance of the other gnomes after the nomio after nomio and juliet hire him yeah did they still say romeo and juliet are they still saying elton john's songs oh i love that i don't know but that's not the first time you guys investigate that because i will not be i will not be looking into this detail this map looks so depressing it's almost like it's no man's land oh my god chris bacon wrote the broke the score

you like country music yeah oh country road take me no i was about to say in my mind hathan again do you know sweet gnome alabama i'm done you know before we were playing d d i was playing crusader kings and i went from a lonely a lowly count in the netherlands all the way up to be the duke of holland and i'm best friends with the king of england and but here here i listened to terrible puns there if somebody becomes a linguist in the next campaign they can be gnome chomsky like there's so many that's an old pawn you can discuss

no i was gonna say yeah yes it is it's the gnome you carry around yeah and there's an actually made that joke in the very first time i joined you guys on the show remember i was like a little numb we were doing that achievement for left 4 dead 2 one time and we started losing because if you do it it's at the carnival at the end you do this like a big rock show and like there's a whole horde the horde after horde yet to fight i think we fought three tanks and at the end one person finally got on the helicopter and starts taking off we're like oh thank god we won um and my friend bobby uh in the only way he could yell into his microphone because we were so worried about just surviving he goes oh we forgot the gnome so we spent two hours doing that achievement and then didn't do the achievement terrible

like from the first part of dark carnival all the way to the end yeah you gotta go bigger go no

go still don't have the achievement does anybody have some ranged attacks we can have gnome on the range all right uh i i just moved i i dashed all right i didn't dash just double moved and uh that's that's double moving is it okay and i scream um

nothing i just an ice cream oh you mean you literally don't scream go big or go gnome you're right fourth layer this dragon is no match oh wait wait sorry no let me find okay this dragon ain't no match for me i don't know that was terrible i wasn't that wasn't yet but it's okay that was what i was going to start so good

david is contemplating gnome puns yeah the direct you know i got to think the dragons are very honestly just wants to retire dragon dragons are very intelligent so i have to consider like it it can see how wounded well it looks invisible but it can sense him anyway because it has blind sense um blind side actually so the question is it's like if it can if it can drop alec in one turn it can probably win the fight

so that's the question and it's real man so i'm gonna roll a die and i'm not gonna tell you what the what i need to roll but if i roll one way it's gonna keep running and if i roll another way it's gonna turn back and try and kill it

okay

no

uh it's done zoomed away

it joined the video chat we're not he's gonna stop there and peek around the corner uh it's ty's turn so if ellie does uh we can just leave right that will not have just said that if one if he dies you don't get you don't get paid i don't know you don't get paid so we leave i mean i mean it works but also he's the one who brought you to this mountain in the middle of the mountains you were rangers so it might everything knows how to get back right we also have to sneak past the dragon to get out of here we can go back the other way what back through the haunted dungeon i'm not sure about that no that's forward the haunted dungeons forward so we could swim around the dragon okay fine no if you go back the other way you have to go back to where that rope bridge was cut but you know the way around the cut rope bridge right right right okay right now is towards the haunted dungeon yes we don't want to go there ellie oh i forgot to tell you ellie totally killed that succubus oh oh well that's something i forgot to write it down uh because he he's i don't know if you're aware uh fiends are his favorite enemy oh okay well no i didn't know yeah uh would you give him something i texted him i told him to tell you but you know oh

the dragon flew so far away so quickly it's gonna make us fight it in its lair it is tyster i know i told him i already moved okay i'm just thinking it's weird that for some reason rogues can just outrun everyone because they can run three times they're good on their feet because they can double dash like mario kart

is that is that your double triple move yeah okay that's my triple move i haven't tripled yet i only did double so far derelict who hasn't moved yet but

yeah uh so yeah i gotta i gotta catch up because everybody's running the pepe la pete well maybe not the picture i feel like it's better see we lured the dragon into here and i feel like now the dragon's like no now we're fighting my layers no it has some advantage there so obviously it's going to flee back to its safety or run away totally so maybe that means we heard it enough that it was like no oh i think we did heard it enough but it's just the question of what to do now uh so i gotta roll i gotta roll what to get down this cliff acrobatics uh yeah if you want yeah it's an acrobatics to not take if you want to do a cool flip or slide or something all right i'm gonna attempt to just to try to cut the distance a little bit i really don't break legs i really hope you legally sit down with your shoe oh oh that was so close holy [ __ ] that was so close did you like listen i went superhero

superhero landings just i'm wearing armor i'm sure that's fine and i wish the rest of the party could see

are you 120 feet from me i saw it no i'm not 20. this area is all 100 this is all dim light you guys can see in here yeah but she's like a hundred feet from me so it's not but i can see for 120 feet okay it's 120 feet of bright light okay for that gnome because the dark vision i i i will message um ty and be like holy [ __ ] derelict just said a superhero landed oh yeah i heard it from here that's that's a double move by the way okay no that's good that's okay you didn't just double move it there though there left phil still real cool oh my god

i got i gotta make sure i got the can get the

at this point it's probably just easier to transition to another map oh freaky

going transition have like a fun swipe like in a powerpoint presentation from 2000 paste did it paste the map

way more painful than yours when you know she would go with you if there was nothing you posted on twitter earlier manuel miranda in the heights did i post something from in the heights i don't remember i remember ratcheting that's what you tweeted today i've tweeted that yeah the main menu the only thing we could tweet

yep oh i hated that about streaming that is that every single movie scene was like blocked and people couldn't see it so i just have to tell them what was happening or they could like hear it but i was like right now the ship does this we're not allowed to uh show it yeah it just looks yeah i mean that's why there is yeah still a little it's a lot of stuff like i kind of get why they do that but at the same time like i want to stream the game yeah getting more people play it

i see what's going on oh it's getting fancy oh yeah we're going we're going back to our beginnings yeah remember the secret door i remember

i still haven't watched that friend's uh reunion it's good it was pretty good i wasn't really a friend yeah it's not like my favorite show in the world but i just watched it to be like oh everybody's watching this house reunion you know it's heartfelt i literally well done i literally literally just started watching friends this past year for the first time i saw i saw a couple of episodes you know when it was on air because you know people because it was everywhere in high school and university would be like what are you guys doing on i think it was thursday nights like we're watching friends like okay i guess i'll come over and drink and watch french fries they're like it's still windy tonight i was like who's wedding okay ross's wedding in

milk group with somebody like well some magazine published like these aged photos of all the the friends actors and what they would look like now and it's like so far off like they look awful in this article but i mean it looked great right i mean it's it's just really funny because they just made them all chubby and gray and that's like what they did was anytime star trek like the characters see themselves in the future or something they're always like like the makeup and stuff you're just like oh like i know that's not how you're gonna look when you're oh yeah and you look at them now and then you're just like yeah you still look like you look nothing like how they thought you'd look like they did an older version of bashir and he looked terrible and now you're looking at me like oh my god you're good look man exactly it's aggressive yeah and i get it they try to like really play up the fact that they're like aging but i'm like they they won't necessarily have all those wrinkles like you're making them look 70 and they're only like 45 yeah which means i'm going to skip everybody to here and i'm just going to continue in the initiative okay so so it is so nobody misses the turn basically um and we'll just assume everybody waited for everybody to catch up and it's finnegan's turn because otherwise it's going to be like this person's behind this particular yeah yeah we roll for 15 minutes to see how fast we run do is the dragon in the wall uh you don't know where the dragon is over here so the mini is available to me they got a head start that's too fast because this room is not illuminated and i know i know most of you have dark vision dare lethal doesn't have dark vision nope yep but you have a shiny shield too no i gotta light it up light fire it up fire it up so what is it

i just continued from the initiative so nobody misses the turn uh i am going to uh let's see where am i am i the last one in this group

you're right here okay one two i can put you all in the same square it doesn't really matter okay i just want to see how far i could go um we can fit four small creatures in one medium square

5 10 15 20 25. i can go 25 right yep one two keep in mind stairs they'll cost twice as much because they're difficult terrain okay i'm gonna go to the opposite side of where ellick is behind that dome statue yeah there nice i'm gonna peer over and yeah and look down the hallway look up the stairwell and i see nasty perceptions go ahead and roll perception check 19 plus 4 23. you smell the distinct smell of brimstone from the next room boy there's no brimstone did you shout that no to you guys and he has the brain thing uh right right sorry sorry tell me and then i could whisper i could i can literally just say it to you guys you guys all here you could talk you're within like 12 feet of each other i'm going to if you want to be sneaky you tell me in my brain right now i'm actually just going to say that out there that whole thing beth kept doing to yasha on critical role where she was like well you can message me and then because beth would cast a message and then beth didn't tell yasha yasha didn't have a telepathic link or something so the barbarian just assumed they could telepathically talk to the wizards oh it was the whole thing worth because of the eyes that um like mauricio and liam were able to do it and then she was like oh can you do it with all of us and then beth was just like [ __ ] with them yeah and she's like oh it's happening i could do it too all right uh there's presumably a dragon in the next room somewhere there's brimstone over there also if you want to have taken another potion before you walk into the next room i'll allow it i don't have a potion yeah they're like people no everyone everyone was on the motion yeah oh so i uh 2d 4 plus 2.

that we can just roll

i've almost made it through the whole conan the barbarian that's

nine nine more hit points for you nice nine hit points for you nine hit points for me i have a potion you'll have one two yeah i should have thrown at you i am going to try is the door open there are once once there were doors here right it's just smashing doors um i know this is going to sound dumb uh would shatters know shadows is like an is a deep dome um would he know whether or not dragons can see in the dark everybody knows dragons can see in the dark so they can see me right now oh wait i can see him too i just want to look in the room yeah i want to look in i want to see what i can see i have a dark vision of 120 feet roll a perception check that's how that did that's a 16. definite smell of brimstone for the next room but you don't see any creatures it's on the ceiling turn the walls here around the walls it's gonna be a pitch black we're gonna have to stand right in front of it um yes i somebody i love that nobody wants to be the first person to go

would absolutely go in there and get murked um

listen i i know who he is um i know who i am i know uh i'm gonna grip my uh warhammer with both hands and walk to the edge of where the door used to be and try and peek in that room again and see if i see anything this was a sitcom it would be family shatters terrible and excellent i love it that sounds like more like a fetish thing that is not me i'm gonna i'm just gonna put that right back family scatters what

oh no

what's going on i'm just going to try to sing more now that i know it's going to get us copyrighted no we won't get copyright if we're singing it's if we're playing the music luckily we're playing copyright free music right now on the street thank you thomas is it copyright free or is it you have a license for it no no he he uh royal it's it's explicitly free for streaming explicit music heller from alpha gaming i don't think he calls that channel that anymore but

yeah there it is one two one two three four five six seven eight nine the ten dollars

you made me come out of mute for that

comes down from above the door and its mouth opens and you see like a pilot light in the middle of its tongue not good and then you see a lot of orange i need everybody but once but me i have to make a deck saving throughout now to be fair i was hiding wasn't i you do have i'm gonna give you three you're gonna get i think it's plus five to this roll because you are mostly behind a wall

sorry that's pretty good this is next cover is plus five yeah you get plus five all right what about me though am i in the open no that wall counts for you okay but if you succeed you can use your saving you can use your uh chatter you have like half cover one third cover that is definitely taking all right another full dragon blast face is dead here's the thing i absolutely respect shadows for being the first one to go through that door yeah dude um do i add the five on top i would i would have gone up in the turn order i didn't make does anybody have revivify uh is anyone here not at level three is anyone here a known biologist

microbiologist at this point if a spell to restore my life is cast on me the caster doesn't need material components for that spell because you took path of the zealot yeah my soul is marked for endless battle so yeah anyway i i made that roll and i'll use the shield to evasion again what do you would you get uh 27. all right yeah um what did everybody else get so i'm adding five on top of my regular you're gonna have five yeah okay then twenty eight twenty eight oh wow yeah well so i i also get a plus five right because for courage for courage for courage here's here's the truth you have an advantage on this role still yeah i just left 13. i absolutely [ __ ] you rolled 13 again yep which no i rolled a 15 the last time um oh well it's a dc 16 unfortunately yeah no it's okay you know what uh the role actually makes sense it's the rule makes sense it's not like it's it's not as though like i have a place to go yeah sometimes you wanna go where you're not burning alive i wrote the same damage 63. i have died everyone uh this is an anomaly should not have occurred i mean fool me once shame on you

um so alec passed uh derelict fell past taking no damage spinning again lucky song pass taking half damage so that would be how much 31. [ __ ] alec takes 15 because he passed anything yeah you might be out i'm i'm i'm out i'm passed out but you're not dead but you're not dead you're not dead it's moderately concerning uh just a quick question um am i just a pile of ash or in my body i think you're ash i mean i feel like if it's massive damage you are incinerated

truthfully this is a young red dragon so maybe maybe your weapons might not be gone but they're definitely not weapons anymore a full red dragon can literally melt magic weapons with its breath weapon uh so you're saying that i'm a pile of ash you a true true resurrection can bring actually resurrection could bring you back as long as somebody has the ash you could be brought back with what are they gonna do sweep me up i'm gonna put you in a bottle don't worry i do have that

okay that is resurrection you've got like a year in true resurrection you've got hundreds of years so you know you could be brought back in another campaign you can be brought back in a jar and the thing is you actually what's great about reincarnation is that they only need part of you that's a druid spell but we don't have any druids nope yet but you might not be a rock gnome or a deep gnome when you come back and think about reincarnation we did janasi a fire gennady come back as a earth genoci that would not that would that would not be a happy gennady right there nope uh you know my player is fine with it um yeah it was that would be dead forever that yeah options um oh my god are you technically no more gnome or faith no more i'm gonna turn you into a run

i'm gonna turn you no i'm not a rock gnome i'm just kidding this is the wrong mini isn't it that's no that's me no that's you that's me yeah is it yeah the one with the hat yes oh i thought you had two swords anyway i have a felix charges him with a big-ass spear

that's the spirit he's standing on me i'm very offended yes very breed i told you he doesn't get it i know he doesn't that's a miss that's a hit that's a 20 or to hit let's laura i'm going to sweep you off your feet i swear and 12. and right into my pouch oh that's a ten plus eight plus six is hey if he kills it himself that's his own damn fault yeah but in melee you can choose not to kill that's the whole point

yeah yeah 24. okay it's real oh god it's so close um actually i think it's a bonus set let me double check here's a bonus action you could visit one creature no no no no no no no he doesn't okay cool um uh he's gonna stay there and he says well just run up and knock it down it's almost done that's ty's turn

okay hi i want you i got a plan that if you do if you do anything but a melee attack you do not have a choice you have to do melee attacks to knock things out okay but you can't get a snake attack here so that's true if you attack it you will have a sneak attack

okay but i want to do my psychic dave it's so bad you can you can punch with you can just mail it you can do that melee or ranged they're psychic knives they literally just have to die so you can throw them or punch them hold on but then you're goating me to come up and if it's not gonna die then i could die next time i'm telling you as a as a man of honor if you hit this thing with a sneak attack it's gonna go down okay hold on i'm gonna move you would have to roll all once to not not and i don't even know i'd have to look at your damage because you do 2d6 plus a d6 for your main hand attack plus you have four or three or something so your minimum damage is six one two three four five so that would only bring me here you can dash oh i can't then you get one then you get one attack yeah but i don't want hold on it's very hard to tell the squares on here it's like one two three um you were what here so one two three four five six but one two there's force four squares of stairs uh one two three four but the stairs also count as difficult terrain yeah so i wouldn't even make it i would have to waste my whole dash and movement just to make it through it's not a waste to get the the killing blow on a dragon little bonus little bonus xp what if i don't hit though and i can't sweep up my friend you know or what if i do the cunning action i could disengage that could help well i could dash again with the yeah okay hold on if i don't hit with the first attack i'm running away okay so if i move and down you only have one attack right here if you dash you only have one attack well that's what i mean like if i i don't think you can actually run away though i mean you're just gonna go back down the corridor to get first then i can't do cunning action so that's right action is the dash hold on you're so worried about whether you're gonna live or die you can you can end it right here if i hit if not it's gonna be like would you guys have like a 45 chance 40 whatever man okay we're doing it watch you're gonna roll a net 20. now after all that you're probably gonna roll on that 20. hold on that's just governments attack is better though it's why would it be i don't understand it should be the same it's decks either way i mean to hit no because the other one is strength right or no that's just my off hand never mind we're good it shows you both options because you can use strength which is weird because you can't sneak attack when you use strength so it should never be strength um but yeah

that just hits doesn't it that hits yeah i hope yeah plus three damage so seeing my friend incinerated before me i'm gonna as much as i fight back my demons literally i'm just gonna let this one loose i'm gonna get real haunted my eyes are gonna go all black and i'm just gonna psychic blades this [ __ ] like right at its throat but not kill it

yeah right isn't that what it like that's the way i can't bonk it on the head that would look so stupid i'm just making sure that you're you're you're with the final blow it's not people they're literally blades i mean yeah you can choose to not kill it you can choose yes i would like to not kill it so bad cool just go i don't but i don't kill it yes i'm not gonna kill it i'm angry you know what i'll turn my psychic blades to the hilts and i'll just bonk it on both sides of the head that's funny make its tongue blep out do that thing where like you clap someone on the ears but for dragons it's worse apparently are you gonna roll damage though oh yeah because if

to actually knock it out i mean she's she's already that's four but it was my sneaky attack so you have to roll on a d6 you have one you have one d6 left to roll well one decision that was my normal damage attack is two and six oh i'm sorry i thought that was the 2d6 okay so four

five nine nine damage it's probably not gonna kill it nine damage oh my god

this is great you're the one who told me to do it i would have waited i would have gotten charged i it literally it has one hit point left okay but i haven't gone yet that's right two more people go before the dragon well somebody else can get the final hit but i got real angry i mean that was that was dope but also really funny that you were 1.05 i mean so close you made it sound like it was so sure with that needed to roll like you need to roll uh seven damage on 3d6 and that's your average roll would be seven and a half on 3d6 so you're you were more likely to to defeat it than not for me who never even landed psychic damage in the last part of the battle no you hit it you got a sneak attack in on it no i didn't the only thing i did that entire battle no i missed both my attacks and then i went and i healed shatters um yes it's like a blade attacks i could play an attack

anyway daryl with his neck all right i promise you i didn't hit it to actually make it up the stairs and hit it with a mace do it

it's more poetic this way darrell this is your adventure here one two i'd rather spend my bonus action sweeping up my friend i'm still hurt

that was the wrong accent yeah

sometimes i just do weird voices like i'll be like oh oh we're doing that's like not even a voice 30. this is one move shoot see yeah i don't think i've got anything that can actually do the damage that is needed the bunk

alex still after you anyway yeah uh yeah no ellic is first alex goes after the dragon yep so the dragon could just this is well the dragon dragon has to roll to succeed it has to roll a four or five or five or six sorry on a on a d6 to get its breath weapon back i was gonna just pop out throw a knife go over and try to heal my friend sweep up your friend because i'm there yeah but think how dope it would have been if you had rolled one more time hey hey tristan how's it going welcome to the stream i was promised mr trister i'm dead hey oh very i did survive 163 point of damage that's so impressive it really was it was great so impressive to survive a straight blast from a red dragon i survived once but not twice and that is honestly reasonable it's gonna like whip me with its tail or something and then i'm gonna die too all right see i i the smarter movie would be actually to res the other note but i think i'll yeah we'll just we'll just we'll do this heroic thing where we defy everybody and discharge up the stairs oh you're not gonna help you're not gonna help finnegan who's next okay if i if i bring him back does he get an action still on his turn yep okay okay all right you healed now you could heal also you could kill him as a bonus action no no no no no no no i need to use no no hold on i need to use a bonus action to sustain him and then uh because that's a cantrip move for me right the spin of the dying right because he's negative right now right oh he's at zero i'm at zero okay you can just cast healing word though and he'll be he'll be awake okay so he still would get an action okay can i do i have to touch him for that one or do i have to no healing words he's arranged okay all right so i'll do a second level healing word on him so that means he heals maximum hit points because he's a zero you're a grave cleric right so he gets uh eight plus four yeah yeah twelve nine all right how do i okay change this

you click on your health okay and then you go boop boop okay i thought i had to do both spells in order to do it but yeah no these man if i roll a six on this d6 and that dragon gets super sorry how much healing it's gonna be if so then i'm literally never going to take any of your advice again you went against everything i wanted to do how much you know one point i know but still you can always roll once like how much healing was that sorry yeah but you can also oh you could also kill twenties you couldn't roll the net 20. you know yeah and yet here we are and that 20 would have actually guaranteed yeah right because that would have been 66 actually well if no all ones would have been nine damage yeah

it's three plus plus six well let's hope eric does it i no it's not gonna happen he can't make it that far he's gonna take it out he's moving to stand up i hate everything by the way it's finnegan's turn now i i would probably hide to be honest i'm gonna wait

wait can you insult it so much you'll forget to breathe fire do that you know what i'm just going to cast do whatever you spell by the way who's got who's got uh who's got the inspiration right now i do i had

it would have been really bad if shatters had died with not rolling inspiration yeah yeah you have one d6 26 yeah yeah so i'm going to use on linux saving throw if i need to that's what it's for okay or the hit i'm going either way okay what's finnegan doing i'm gonna cast sleep on this dragon okay good job okay uh go ahead and roll your uh roll your dice for sleep wait you have to roll for that yeah of course yeah it's a roll hitter yeah it's been the same since first edition oh i thought it was just a straight save there's no save on sleep it either works or it doesn't work you roll dice you roll a certain number of dice and if it and you start with the lowest hit point creature i'm from mistaken i gotta double check uh yeah yeah you're right and then you work your way up from there the spell sends a creature into magical slumber roll 5d8 assuming you're casting your first level the total is how many hit points of creatures the spell can affect no no i'm creatures within 20 feet of a point you choose so i'm guessing you're going to choose 20 feet around the dragon yeah um i'm doing my second journey

ignoring unconscious creatures starting with the creature that is the lowest hit points each creature affected spot that just falls unconscious um so go ahead and roll your dice i have uh 68 because i'm doing the second level one okay cool

uh nine i hope it works i'm also i'm just going to be a nice dm here and assume you didn't include any of your friends in this this area yeah no no no nine plus 14 is thanks 23 23.

34. okay i don't know if you're aware no but in previous editions of d dragons were immune to sleep for some reason in this version they're not oh thank the fifth edition so that dragon butt's coming is asleep

spell like for the last two weeks i because i and not do it right away leap worked on a dragon because dragons genuinely used to be immune to sleep and they're not anymore why is my kid i decided to be able to resist it i was like well let's try it but don't count on it so yeah there we go i was like buff first and then you sleep as a later resort i figured at this point it's not going to happen yeah just do it no we're all on our last move there i mean he could have blasted us again she and just for fun i'm gonna say gonna say just for [ __ ] oh you got shite the sea wouldn't give you a wave

that's good

is incredibly dead but alex gonna try and kill it instead of just bonk it out no alec is gonna take out a uh bottle yeah a bottle and just jump it down the throat of this dragon um and it's asleep so it doesn't get a saving throw uh and you watch as its form turns a dull gray dragon in a jar and this object he has is like glowing hot and he puts it in his bag of holding hmm and he goes i can't [ __ ] believe that worked wait is the dragon body still there can i out but so the body's just gone gray yeah and he starts walking away but where's that money

because oh you want to get paid now here and he you know takes out his a pouch out of his bag of holding and he throws it at you and he throws one at ty and he throws one at there

because i guess i guess you get the the other ones i'm going to turn and immediately start sweeping up shatters and putting her

while i'm scooping up shatters ashes uh my little uh whatchamacallit am i saying that shows directions compass that's a word my compass is just pointing at the dust so i'm like shoving it in well good work alec see you around because don't worry i'll i'll bring it back to time oh before you go um do you mind taking us back to the dragon's lair i'd like to see what it had

he's like i'll just i'll meet you outside when you're ready okay i couldn't care less about it it's hard all right well as long as we're all open about that um

uh starts like like getting real cold what your shield starts getting yeah yeah no no i'm my character's going like the [ __ ] yeah okay um i look at it did the expression change what's going on um yeah it's grinning oh on its own and its mouth opens up okay and the skull in the shield yeah leaps out into the dragon what oh [ __ ] and then this is to be continued now

uh okay to be continued [ __ ] off good night everyone goodbye

you...